Breakups are never easy, but they don’t have to be stressful.
There are tons of people who have been through breakups and come out the other side better off than before. It’s not always an overnight process though — things can get tough for a while, but with these tips, you’ll be able to handle it all in stride!
Putting their ex on a pedestal; Trying to change them; Waiting around for something that will never happen; Being too emotional about everything; Focusing on what went wrong instead of what went right; Not caring about themselves enough — are all very common mistakes people make after a breakup. It’s important to remember that you are the only person who has complete control over your life, and these types of mistakes can seriously affect how long it takes you to get back on your feet after losing someone.
Let’s move on!
1. Put your feelings in perspective
It’s sometimes hard to get over a breakup, but it doesn’t have to be. I know all of this because I’ve been there myself. My last breakup was tough for me, but I made it through it and came out the other side in one piece. One of the keys to getting past my break-up was perspective.
I had put my ex on a pedestal when they were with me — I expected everything they told me, thought what they wanted, and did what they wanted to do. When we broke up my perspective changed quickly. They weren’t perfect after all! I was able to move on without feeling like I regretted anything because I wasn’t living in this dream world where everything they said or suggested was perfect for me.
Another thing that helped was remembering that breakups are never easy, but they don’t have to break you. I got stuck in the mindset of “what if” — what if we get back together? What if I never find anyone better? What if this is the best person who will ever come along for me? I made my life harder by constantly questioning all of these things. What I eventually realized was that this is just how breakups are — you’re supposed to go through tough times right after it happens, but just remember that it will pass.
Time heals all wounds, they say, and it’s true.
2. Remember that this too shall pass
I can’t tell you that I know what it’s like because every person is different. My best advice is to put your feelings in perspective.
If you’re constantly questioning every “what if” scenario, running around in circles over the past, or not doing anything productive when you have free time, then it won’t get better.
One of the things that helped me when I was going through my breakup was remembering that this too shall pass. That doesn’t sound very comforting at first, but what it means is that there will always be good times and bad things in life — up and down never goes away…but eventually, it will all come back up again.
3. Get rid of the things you don’t need anymore, like clothes, shoes, and books — it’ll make you feel better
People accumulate a lot of things in their lifetime — clothes, shoes, books, etc. It’s always good to get rid of the things you don’t need anymore because it makes for a less cluttered home. That doesn’t mean you have to throw everything away though. There are plenty of ways to recycle old items. You can sell them on various sites, donate them to charity shops or second-hand stores, or give them to friends or family members who may want them. It will be difficult at first, but trust yourself to get rid of everything you have that reminds you of your ex — burn them! — and you’ll feel like a huge weight is lifted off your shoulders.
4. Talk to friends about how they coped with breakups when they happened to them
Talking to friends about the breakup is a great resource for getting an outside perspective on things. It can help you feel better because you may learn that they went through something similar and were able to come back from it. It can also be nice to share your feelings with them and get everything out in the open. If you don’t have friends close by and you don’t want to meet anyone just yet, then ping them on WhatsApp or Facebook. You can do it on Instagram also, Mark Zukerberg won’t mind!
Online communities can be a great place to vent your feelings and get feedback from people who have been in similar situations. You can search for forums, Yahoo groups, etc., that are devoted to helping people with breakups and getting over them — you’ll find plenty of posts from people with their own stories and advice about what they did when they were going through it.
5) Take care of yourself by eating healthy food and getting plenty of sleep every night
It can be tempting to comfort yourself with junk food and sleep after a breakup, but that’ll only make you feel worse. When you’re going through a tough time, it’s important to take care of yourself. That means eating well and getting plenty of rest every night — both will help you recover from the sadness. You can also take up a new hobby as a way to take your mind off things. The important thing here is to be gentle with yourself and not put too much pressure on yourself to “move on”.
6. Do something new every day — try a new restaurant or take up a new hobby!
This is a common tip that has been suggested to people who are going through breakups. Doing something new every day can be anything such as trying out a new restaurant (or hotdog stand), going on a new adventure, or going for a hike in the woods.
When I was going through my breakup, I had this realization one day that I should learn how to play guitar. Back in college, I was in a band for three whole years. I always had guitars around me, but I didn’t learn. I remained a mediocre vocalist. Thanks to my breakup, I can pretty much play any song today!
Whether it’s working out with a friend or taking up an old hobby like playing an instrument, doing something new every day will keep your mind off of the breakup and help you feel better. It doesn’t matter how big or small the activity is; if it makes you happy then do it! It could be spooning ice cream into your mouth or using all of the tissues in your house to make a pillow fort — anything that makes you feel good.
Just because it’s really easy for people to lose themselves in relationships doesn’t mean it’s healthy. Taking care of yourself by sleeping, eating well, and exercising can boost your mood and keep you positive. Plus, since you’re doing things like taking care of yourself, then you’ll feel better about not wasting time on something that didn’t work out! No one wants to be the person who is distracted from their goals — do what feels right to get rid of any negative feelings you have towards your ex-partner.
Basically, have fun moving on!
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